To be single or not to be single?

So, prior to July 12th of this year, talking about my dating life was not an option. Actually, it was non-existent, so there was absolutely nothing to talk about. Since moving to North Carolina, I have found myself meeting quite a few men. Again I say MEN..not boys. The majority that I have met, have it together. They are driven and have great careers. Not to mention, they have this southern charm that I am enamored by. Trouble? Possibly, but I’m having fun with it. Being the new girl in town is a title that I am owning and loving. First off, it’s a great conversation starter and secondly, many men find it quite interesting. However, the “new factor” will soon wear off and you will just be another chick. Until then, I’m goin to milk it for what it’s worth. It’s amazing how one move to a new city can change your life. The place that I am in now is completely different than 3 months ago. Prior to moving here, I found myself thinking about marriage often and second guessing my decision to break it off with my “crazy” ex. He is another blog entry for a totally different day! As of today, marriage isn’t on the forefront and I’m more open to dating. Oh, and my ex….so glad I let that go! There is a beauty about having options but there is also a downside to it. Too many options can confuse the heck out of you. It’s like going to baskin robbins and wanting to try every flavor. One thing that I know for sure is that I am learning more about what I don’t want but I still can’t seem to figure out what it is I DO want. My friend Dee introuduced me to the term, “keeping your funnel full”. It means that you need to have a good rotation of men and not put all of your eggs in one basket. Men do it all the time! However, you want to make sure to keep it classy and we all know what that means. One thing about keeping your funnel full of options is that you encounter many different qualities that you are attracted to. What one guy seems to lack, another one has. However, finding the total package is the tricky part. No rush, I ‘m sure it will come but hopefully sooner rather than later. A relationship is definetly something I want in the near future but right now, I am just enjoying the space that I am in the company that I surround myself with. Single, yes…but certainly not lonely 🙂

Underated and Unappreciated

So as I sit here pondering the past couple of days the words that keep coming to me are, Underated and Underappreciated. I hate that I have to start my first blog off with negativity but a girl has to vent! If you are not careful, blogging can get you into trouble so I will do my best to not disclose too much personal information. First thing first…I’m so sick and tired of playing the role of the perky, bubbly and positive girl at the work place. It doesn’t get me ANYWHERE! Our company has been telling me for a while that we were going to recieve increase in our pay so for months I have been looking forward it. I was imagining of all the things that I could do with that extra money. Once again…for months I have been looking forward to this. So, today was the big day, the day that I was going to find out what I was going to get paid. As I walked into my bosses office, I was beaming inside and knew that this was the moment that ALL of my hard work has paid off. He gave me the envelope that held the fate of future salary. As I opened it and looked at the numbers, I just stared!! What the hell!!!!!!!! Here I am thinking that I would get a couple grand extra on my salary but no..it was only $1400 dollars. Which amounted to a 3.50%  increase for the year. As my boss started talking about how much I meant to the company and how I was the most positive person on the team and how I recieved the highest increase, I can do nothing but smile and nod. In my head I was thinking to myself “This is some bull****. Of course I didn’t want to come off as the angry black girl so I kept my composure and tried to listen to what he had to say. To be honest, I tuned alot of what he had to say out. No disrespect to my boss, he is a great person but at the moment there was nothing that he could say at that time to change the way I felt. Some people would say, “well at least it will be $14000 dollars more than you had last year. That’s all great and everything but the real reason I am so upset is because I know for a fact that I make less money than every person in here. Rather it’s due to lack of experinece or whatever the case is, I know that I work hard and bring alot of things to the team that others don’t. In the end, I just want management to stop praising me for all of the qualities that i possess unless they are going to pay me for it!! Oh and the only thing my boss could have said that would have changed the way i felt would have been, “I’m sorry Chyla, we made a mistake. Let me contact HR”!